John Cleese: Political Correctness Can Lead to a…: http://youtu.be/QAK0KXEpF8U
Inspired by Lauren Laverne’s brilliant piece on this very subject, I decided to write about those friends we’ve all encountered over the years – but sometimes sort of wish we hadn’t.
1) The inconsolable one
“Are you feeling a little better now?” you ask, with a hopeful smile. “No,” they reply gloomily. Your heart sinks. You’ve just spent three hours hashing out what has quite frankly transpired to be an entirely inconsequential and fairly average problem, and even your best attempts to cheer this friend up HAVE NOT WORKED.
Example conversation with the inconsolable one…
You: Why don’t you just try and see how it goes? I’m sure it’ll be better next week when things calm down at work.
IO: I can’t. Things are never calmer at work.
You: Well, maybe it’s time to discuss it with a manager, then? That might help – and you’ll get things off…
View original post 909 more words
This year, I became a fully fledged, pink-license-wielding driver. Vroom vroom! Now I’ve stopped crying each time I actually use my car (I’m not what you’d call confident when it comes to this sort of thing), I’ve started to pick up a few things on my travels – here’s what I’ve learned…
1) No-one actually ‘feeds’ the wheel between their hands as they steer
Your driving instructor lied to you. Mine lied to me. HOW DOES THAT FEEL? I have come to the conclusion that I am the only person ever to take this silly rule as gospel and actually try to follow it through in ‘real life’ situations. Is the rest of the world laughing at me? Probably. Do you feed the wheel between your hands? No. No-one does. We’re all about the hand-crossing. We laugh in the face of danger. Hahahaha!
2) People will see your fear-stricken face…
View original post 861 more words
If you’ve been keeping up with my web log (thaaaank you) you’d notice these arrrghasms share a theme: driving. Specifically poor driving. I don’t know if it’s just a Maryland and Pennsylvania thing, but driving today is one big psychic game and we’re all supposed to guess at which way we’re going, because apparently the car manufacturers are no longer making turn signals. I’m guessing it’s a vestigial organ for cars: at one point it was useful, but now it’s just a big pain in the ass.
This is especially irksome when someone. Is. Driving. Real. Slooooooooowwwwwwwww….and then they throw their turn signal on as they turn. I feel like bashing my head against my steering wheel when I see this colossal bit of driving incompetence. Now, anyone that has been to driving school will know that the rule is you turn on your turn signal well before your turn…
View original post 441 more words